*grinning* oh yeah! :roll: :roll: :roll:

Sorry, I have to say all that I receive through e-mail are definitely risque :oops:

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~Lily~
First Sydney Ammiratore and "A Usual Suspect"
"If music be the food of love, play on"

:lol: <GUFFAW>
Kay

*Hahaha* Bev! I loved the Barbie joke. Funny stuff!

Here's another rated G (sorta') joke. Enjoy!

Two guys, Scott and Brian, are on a golf course. After a couple of holes they get to the next tee, only to find a duo of women taking their time in getting to the green.

After a couple of minutes and growing impatient, Scott says "Screw this. I'm gonna go over there and tell them to hurry the hell up.". He starts off towards the women, only to turn around and come back.

"What happened?" asks Brian. "I can't go over there. One of them is my wife and the other is my mistress." Scott says. "Alright, I'll go then." says Brian.

Brian makes his way towards the women, before he too, suddenly turns around and comes back.

"What the hell happened?" asks Scott.

"Wow. Small world" Brian says.

Got this e mail from a friend

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I get all those ones as well. I thought they might be a bit too cheeky (no pun intended) for our younger members? No? OK - from now on ...... :twisted:

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~Lily~
First Sydney Ammiratore and "A Usual Suspect"
"If music be the food of love, play on"

Cheeky!! :lol: :lol:

Heyy...does anyone know what PETA stands for? I'm thinking People Eating Tasty Animals.

With that firmly secured in mind:

Temptressg:

Heyy...does anyone know what PETA stands for? I'm thinking People Eating Tasty Animals.

Cute photo... would I be correct in presuming that the sign is away from the Big Smoke

and I'm sure the PETA question was rhetorical..

but ....... People for Ethical Treatment for Animals

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Yes, that was a rhetorical question. Thanks though. :lol:

My son's have a plumbing business......I wonder if they want to paint their trucks the same?...........NO, probably not but it would certainly get attention in our town. :roll:


Jeanie

A bnunch of funnies from my friend...

What a brilliant concept
http://cgi.ebay.com.au/ws/ebayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&catagory=19270&item=5513449739&rd=1#ebayphotohosting


(Maybe the e bay patron should have read this first)

FAIRY TALE FOR WOMEN OF THE 21st CENTURY

Once upon a time,

~~~~~~~~~

in a land far away

~~~~~~~~~

a beautiful, independent,

~~~~~~~~~

self-assured princess

~~~~~~~~~

happened upon a frog as she sat,

~~~~~~~~~

contemplating ecological issues

~~~~~~~~~

on the shores of an unpolluted pond

~~~~~~~~~

in a verdant meadow near her castle.

~~~~~~~~~

The frog hopped into the princess' lap

~~~~~~~~~

and said: Elegant Lady,

~~~~~~~~~

I was once a handsome prince,

~~~~~~~~~

until an evil witch cast a spell upon me.

~~~~~~~~~

One kiss from you, however,

~~~~~~~~~

and I will turn back

~~~~~~~~~

into the dapper, young prince that I am

~~~~~~~~~~

and then, my sweet, we can marry

~~~~~~~~~~

and setup housekeeping in your castle

~~~~~~~~~~

with my mother,

~~~~~~~~~~

where you can prepare my meals,

~~~~~~~~~~

clean my clothes, bear my children,

~~~~~~~~~~

and forever

~~~~~~~~~~

feel grateful and happy doing so.

~~~~~~~~~~

That night,

~~~~~~~~~~

as the princess dined sumptuously

~~~~~~~~~~

on a repast of lightly sauteed frog legs

~~~~~~~~~~

seasoned in a white wine

~~~~~~~~~~

and onion cream sauce,

~~~~~~~~~~

she chuckled and thought to herself:

~~~~~~~~~~

I don't ******* think so.

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Mmmm...frog legs.
I only tried them once. Fried.
It tasted really good...tastes like chicken!

I got a joke. I got this from another message board. Good, clean, fun.

A man lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh theatre. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the man, "Sorry, sir, but you're only allowed one seat." The man groaned but didn't budge. The usher became impatient. "Sir, if you don't get up from there I'm going to have to call the manager." Again, the man just groaned, which infuriated the usher who turned and marched briskly back up the aisle in search of his manager.

In a few moments, both the usher and the manager returned and stood over the man. Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move him, but with no success. Finally, they summoned the police. The cop surveyed the situation briefly then asked, "All right buddy, what's your name?" "Sam," the man moaned. "Where ya from, Sam?" With pain in his voice Sam replied "The balcony."


-Sarah

LOL. That sounds painful. :lol:

LOL Sarah! I can tell that one at work! :wink:

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Just got this from my son... may have done the rounds.. but I'd not seen it......

I'm not sending you this rather graphic picture of an overdose
victim for shock value. Rather, it's in the hopes that you will
have a frank discussion with friends and family about at least
respecting moderation or knowing their own limits and knowing
when to just walk away...

When you view this picture, remember: This did NOT have to happen.

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The poor cat. I will sit my cat down tonight and have a Q&A sesh with her. Tsk...tsk...